WHY?

why it was'nt?
you should be here now, but you are'nt.
new life escaped.
was it me?
did i say you out of life?
i wanted you ....i needed you.
it hurts.
im worthless. i feel empty .
walking through the days with no purpose.
ive never felt this before, im feeling it now.
letting it absorb my being.
how much longer, i hope not much.
hopelessness sucks!!!

I Need You More - Bethel Live

i'll rise.

Rythmns flowing through my soul
raging to let loose and dance to life.
Bursting forth out of my broken heart,
comes a pain for the self inflicted hurt of my past.
releasing
allowing my feelings to find a grave.
crucified, buried, put to death.
I will rise.
rise, rise, rise.